All parents develop their own styles to make their toddler behave. Some rely on tried-and-tested methods of disciplining their child while others resort to more unconventional ways.
However, some of these non-traditional ways could actually be doing more harm to your young one.
Here are disciplinary styles that every parent must avoid.
1 – Don’t Bribe
When toddlers are bribed by their parents, they learn to associate good behavior with rewards and therefore, they come to expect rewards every time good behavior is required of them.
Consequently, that good behavior comes only with a reward, and they may even stop reacting with good behavior once rewards are not given.
2 – Don’t Lie
Lying to toddlers just to make them behave and do your bidding will have dire consequences later on. It is best to be always truthful to your child and if that is impossible, at least don’t make a habit of telling big lies to your toddler.
Also, at some point, your child will find out that you were not telling the truth and that can negatively affect the way he responds to you disciplining him.
And while it’s very tempting to use white lies, it is still best to stick to facts and reality when dealing with a toddler.
3 – Don’t Give Ultimatums
Young children need to see your authority as their parent. It makes them feel secure to know that there are mature, responsible, knowledgeable, authoritative people around them.
However, when you make ultimatums to your child such as telling them to eat their food or the monster will come and get them, they will want to test your threat.
A toddler who does not want to eat will close his mouth and although scared, he will want to see if what you said is true. So he’ll wait for the monster and when no monster comes, he’ll know that your words are empty.
4 – Don’t Play Good Cop, Bad Cop
Do you and your partner play the “good cop, bad cop” when disciplining your toddler?
Even if it works, your child’s relationship with the parent that plays the “bad cop” may eventually suffer. Both parents need to be the “good cop”.
Every toddler must be able to feel safe with both parents and not just one of them. Also, children look up to their mother and father and will expect only the good from both of them.
5 – Don’t Be Divided
When disciplining a toddler, the mother and father need to have a united front. Once your child sees any weakness in any one of his parents, he will use this to get what he wants.
Therefore, parents need to talk before creating rules, setting limits, giving rewards or implementing punishments.
Plus, they have to agree on everything, otherwise the toddler will sense that one parent does not agree and he will take advantage of this.
For instance, if the rule is that the child can only have one scoop of ice cream, then both parents need to be firm about implementing it.
If one parent backs down and gives the toddler another scoop, then the rule is broken and the other parent’s authority is undermined.
For the child to learn discipline and recognize both parents’ authority, moms and dads need to stick together.
Furthermore, a parent should never say anything to a toddler that disparages the other parent. This will only confuse a young child and can affect the way he regards the parent who disses and the parent being dissed.
6 – Don’t Set High, Unreasonable Expectations
Your child is a toddler. What were you really expecting from a child aged 2, 3, 4, or 5?Praise your child for achievements and good behavior. Allow him to make mistakes that he can learn from. Don’t put pressure on your very young child to be something that he isn’t ready for yet. Treasure your child in his young age. Let him be a toddler.
Praise your child for achievements and good behavior. Allow him to make mistakes that he can learn from.Don’t put pressure on your very young child to be something that he isn’t ready for yet. Treasure your child in his young age. Let him be a toddler.
Don’t put pressure on your very young child to be something that he isn’t ready for yet. Treasure your child in his young age. Let him be a toddler.